What constitutes cheating?

So today on the radio they were talking about the 20/60/20 rule of cheating. 20% of men will never cheat, 60% of men will slip up at some point and cheat, 20% of men always cheat. So many people called in and the guys all said they fall into the 60%. But the girl on the show said before marriage it doesn’t count. That got me thinking…
What is cheating? Is it black and white? Is it relative to the situation.
I still don’t know what I think.
Maybe that’s because to my knowledge I have never been cheated on. In high school I did make out with my friends boyfriend so I was a cheater. I have never cheated on a boyfriend or my husband.
My husband says he is not a cheater. He says it’s black and white for him, meaning if I ever cheat marriage is over no matter what. But we went through a rough period in our dating lives and broke up. He was dating a woman and still seeing me every now and again. I knew about the other girl but she didn’t know about me.
I used to say in marriage it’s black and white, you cheat it’s over. But I have seen people come back and survive cheating and have a better than ever marriage. Is it possible? Could you forgive your significant other? I have also seen lots of people destroyed by it.
I honestly believe sometimes it’s just sex. But to be intimate- close in a way only a wife and husband should be is wrong. I believe you can cheat without sex. Some say if you feel guilty about what you did then you cheated. Some say if there is no relations no cheating.
I know I will NEVER cheat on my husband. I know never say never. But in all honesty that’s not me I don’t care if Brad Pitt needs me to take him to save the world- we would all parish. I couldn’t become a call girl if my family was broke. I just couldn’t. My family means too much to me. My husband feels the same way. So while our views on cheating differ, our views on marriage are the same.

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About thecoffeeqween

I am a 30 something year old mom, wife, and lover of all things coffee and tea. I have two kick ass boys, a hubs who looks like Collin Ferrell, and a killer job as a store manager for Starbucks. Follow me as I juggle it all downing espresso, raising boys and learning to be happy with what I got!
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