I am breastfeeding. This is the first time I am able to exclusively breast feed. But it hasn’t been easy. Callen falls asleep a lot. He takes at least an hour to nurse. 2 nights he has been up crying for 4 hours straight wanting to nurse over and over because he is so sleepy he can’t wake up enough to nurse properly.
I lost it last night. Around 4:45 my husband got up because Callen wouldn’t stop crying. He walks into his room and finds me rocking him sobbing. I couldn’t help it anymore. Breastfeeding is supposed to bond a mother and child. I feel like I don’t get to spend quality time with Callen because I’m timing this nursing, logging which side, making sure he stays latched. God when does it get easier?
I know the first week of breastfeeding is the hardest. I cried myself to sleep last night and woke crying again. I gave the hubs a bottle of pumped milk last night and that’s how he finally got baby to sleep. Poor guy is so exhausted he is sleeping and I can’t bring myself to wake him. I know we will find our groove. I know it will get easier. But right now there is no light only fog.